Mushy but true

Most of the time I don't believe in god. Every once in a while, I think there's some bigger force out there, overseeing everything. On those days, I think whatever that bigger force is, decided to "give me" Josh because of the other crap I got in life. He doesn't make up for it, and I'd totally dump him in half a heartbeat if I could have Topher or my mom or nana back.

But while I've got him, he's pretty awesome. When we come home at the end of the day, and he asks how my day was, he looks at me to listen to my answer. He is so nice to my sisters, like above and beyond. He bought me tampons (and got the right ones). He's picked up birth control pills. Even though he doesn't need to, Josh cuts out coupons and looks for sales, because he knows it's important to me.

Once, when I was sick and had a paper due the next day, Josh typed it up from my notes while I was taking a nap. When we can't open a jar and ask him to do it, when Josh is handing it back he thanks us for loosening it for us. He explained March Madness and how to bet. Three times. He has listened to my sisters friend-dramas and remembers who they're in fights with. Even though Josh trusts me and is never jealous, he always makes it a point to introduce me to his girl friends so I won't worry or get jealous. He always invites me to hang out with his friends if I'm not working.

To say Josh grew up differently from me would be a huge understatement. He didn't know how to do a lot of stuff that I thought was like basic knowledge when we moved in together, because he always had other people who had done everything for him. But he has learned, and now sometimes he takes paper towel to wipe down the area in front of the front door when we've all come in from the snow or rain. He cleans out the sink now. If he takes the last clean towel he does a load of laundry. Josh even knows to go into my sisters' room to get the towels they've left in there. When I have to study for a test, Josh sometimes leaves me a good luck note in my bag to find that morning, and he often orders pizza or does dinner and cleanup so I have more study time.

When I told Josh I wanted to try to get to bed by midnight or 1am by the very latest, he started telling me the time each night at 11:30. He asks what else I need to do before I can go to sleep and if it's something he can do for me, he usually does. Josh will pack my lunch for the next day when he's putting away dinner leftovers. Yesterday I saw Josh looking at our shoes (we take them off right when we walk in the front door) and asked what he was doing. He said it was nothing. Today he came home with three pairs of flip flops for us. I totally lucked out. Totally, totally, totally.