Saving Craig

Mama,

I haven't felt like writing lately and have been super busy. This weekend was Danielle's dance recital. She invited Aunt Elaine but she didn't come. We brought Dani flowers and Alex took us out for ices afterwards. The head of the school announced to everybody that they accept donations of old dance clothes that are too small so next week I'm going to check if they got any for Alex and Dani for camp. They have to wear them five days a week so if we get two sets for each we can wash one while they wear the other one.

This weekend was also the going-away party for my friend who's moving. Even though she's not moving until school ends. It was fun, and this girl who has twin babies was there too, and the babies were cute. They're seven months old and fraternal and were happy the whole time. This girl Michelle brought some kind of dip she made at home, and after the party I heard she got sick from her own dip. I didn't eat any.

Today was my college meeting. He kept trying to tell me cosmotology would be best for me because I could start earning money sooner and I kept saying no. The AP finally had to say, "I think it's been well established Sam is on the road to college, so why don't we focus on what she needs to do to get there." I knew it was a good idea to ask him to come. Then, like Makesha had given him a script, he asked if I have any ideas of where I want to go, and suggested Rutgers. I told him, "I hate New Jersey." He said I should go check it out. I said that although I can go out of state, my 9/11 scholarships will pay for more school if I stay within the SUNY/CUNY systems. I also said that I want to avoid culture shock so I want to go to college in a city, but I don't really care which one.

The AP made a good point - that maybe I should consider CUNY schools if I plan to have my sisters living with me, so they can stay in their schools and not have to change. I kind of had in my head all along that I'd go upstate somewhere and there'd be green, rolling hills with buildings at the tops of them - maybe because that's what all college brochures look like. But staying local might be a good idea. The AP also said I should keep Northern California in mind for college. He said it meets none of my personal criteria, but he has a feeling about that area for me, and I should consider it. Ummm ... sure. I know NOTHING about Northern California.

After a while, it was like the meeting was just supposed to be between me and the AP and my guidance counselor was just there to observe. We went over which AP finals I should take and he wrote out a schedule for next year that I should have based on passing everything this year. I feel like it's official now - like I'm in the car on the road to college (in my mind, the road is cobblestone).

Here's the funny thing - when I met with Craig today and told him about my college meeting, he said he could TOTALLY see me in CA! He got all excited and said I would love it, and if I ever have an opportunity to go out there, I should jump at it, that it's perfect for me. I don't get these people - what's so great about California?

Craig also told me he's working on getting Aunt Elaine somebody, kind of like a case worker, and that the person won't be connected to him, so she won't feel like I told on her. Somebody to make sure she's getting all the stuff she needs. He said it's a huge problem that she's not going out OR letting anybody in. That one or the other needs to change. Craig said it'll take a couple of weeks, but his goal is to get her to let people in the house, and then if he needs to, he will personally deliver us beds this summer. He also wants to get her a home health aide who comes a few times a week. Craig said on paper it'll be for Aunt Elaine, but in reality it'll help me a lot, because that person will go food shopping and cook dinner and clean and do a lot of stuff I do. I asked if they'll get us our special milk or if it's like WIC, where you can't pick which brands of things you want. I'd rather not be a beggar if I can't be a chooser.

He said he's not signing us up for WIC, and we can probably go food shopping with the person to show her our brands. That this won't give us money, but services. This could be really, really good. If the person can convince Aunt Elaine to open the door.

I told Craig that Aunt Elaine's leg is still swollen, her knee isn't getting better, that she still can't really walk without using a walker. She doesn't do her physical therapy, even though Alex offers to do it with her every day. Her leg is swollen because she's supposed to put it up higher than her heart, which means she has to lay in bed and put it on pillows, but she doesn't do that. Craig said he's not sure he can do anything about that without jeopardizing us staying with Aunt Elaine, so he'll look into it, but I shouldn't expect anything.

It feels like stuff is happening finally. Cautiously hopeful.
Love,
Sam