Thursday, October 25, 2007

Gray Thursday

I forgot to put on my watch today. I check the time like 49282 times each day, and not wearing a watch is awful. Usually I turn off my cell phone in class, and turn it back on in between classes. Vibrate is so loud.

I risked it anyway, even though they threaten to take away cell phones if they ring in class. But you can see the tan line on my wrist where my watch is.

Then, my social studies teacher wasn't bombarded with people at the end of class so I asked him how much time Moot Court would be, because it sounds like fun and Craig said I should try to join stuff. And he said, "If you're starting out with hesitations because of the time commitments, then this is not the group for you. Look into volunteering, where they'll appreciate the ten minutes you'll halfheartedly give." Wow. Way to be a prick. Grownups wonder why kids are so disinterested in school - THIS is why. Because you treat us like assholes.

Then I had shrinking, and Craig can't switch me to an earlier time slot. And he can't drive me home. And Danielle's shrink CAN see her at an earlier time slot, but I'm not sure that helps us. Well, maybe it helps her - she can bring Alex and then they can go home together from there and it won't have been dark for too long. I don't know.

I told Craig maybe he should be fired because I still feel all fucked up and angry. But he asked how many fights I've been in since I started coming to him. None. I mean, I've been involved, but I haven't thrown any punches lately. It just feels like a waste anyway. He hasn't gotten us beds, Aunt Elaine hates us (except Alex), nothing is better.

Then when I came home there was a big group of boys standing near the door and they wouldn't let me in. "Give us something." How about my middle finger, would you like that? What a freaking pain. So I went down the street and called Dani to tell her and she said there's a side door so I went back but couldn't find it and then they saw me and screamed that they already told me to leave and started throwing things so I left again. I fucking hate living here.

Twice in 45 minutes I got asked if I had weed by druggies while I sat on the curb waiting for the door to be free.

Lastly, I planned this morning that for dinner I'd have Grape Nuts with a banana, and I put out two of them. Aunt Elaine ate one and the other one still has green on it. There is nothing good to eat now.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

sam, that is TERRIBLE! i don't know what to say. you shouldn't have to live in a place like that.
i hope those boys leave off after a while. at least types like that get bored quickly. assholes.
and that social studies teacher is not much better. why do grownups always have to be so ... so ... oh, i don't know. that guy assumes he knows everything about you and he doesn't know shit, doesn't even care. damn frustrating.