Tuesday, December 13, 2011

No parents allowed

On a project for one of my classes I'd gotten bad feedback from my professor and talked my way into getting an extension, giving me time to redo it. Today I ran to drop off my project because today at the end of his office hours was the absolute deadline. He only had a half hour left in office hours when I got there, and his door was closed plus there were people waiting outside. Keeping an eye on the clock, I figured if it got to the point where there were only five minutes left, I'd just slide it under the door and also leave a voicemail saying I did that to get it to him under the deadline without interrupting.

My jacket was folded and I was sitting on it studying for my first final when the door opened and like three or four people walked out. Everyone kind of had that aggressive energy where you're trying to be polite because you're in front of the person who determines your grade but at the same time you'll cut a bitch if anyone cuts ahead of you in line. My professor looked at all of us waiting and announced, "This is college. You should be able to talk to me without your mommy. I don't bite." The guy leaning across the wall opposite me quietly told the woman next to him, "See? I told you."

I hadn't realized it at first, but it turned out I was the only one there without a parent. It's hard to be sure, but even if my mom were still alive, I can't quite imagine bringing her to school with me to just drop off a paper. My teacher told us he'd see whoever had shown up on their own first because he knew it'd be quick, so I popped up and walked in. Dropping my project on his desk, I nodded at the clock on the wall. "Made your deadline." He nodded. "Now if you'd brought your parents, grandparents and two favorite aunts, what's taking 30 seconds now would be taking 20 minutes. Thank you for giving me a shred of hope for the future."

My hope is this translates to my grade...

5 comments:

Nina said...

That is so crazy! I went to a commuter school for undergrad and now I go to another, different commuter school for grad school. (Commuter as in a good portion of the students live at home with their parents still and commute to school.) I teach freshmen. I have never ever seen or heard of somebody bringing their parent to talk to their professor. It's college! Even when I was in hs, people would laugh at you if your parent interfered in something like this. Is this a NYC thing? Or did a lot of your classmates go to private school for high school? Perhaps that's why? I can't even imagine...

Mizasiwa said...

We went last month to drop my oldest younger sister (18) as the university she is going to next year - the residence were she will be staying was having an open day and question answer session. So we dropped her off and went to have breakfast down the road while we waited. When we went to fetch her 2 hours later she told us she was the only kid without a parent. We thought that was weird too...

Sam said...

Nina I really doubt most of these kids went to private hs. Or if they did, it was of the drug rehab variety. If you went to private hs, then you can do way better than just a CUNY college.

Miz bringing parents to see where you'll LIVE for a YEAR seems reasonable to me. But just to talk to the teacher you see 2 or 3 times a week on a regular basis?

Anonymous said...

It’s an epidemic. Helicopter parents are everywhere these days. I read an article a while back about employers who are having to deal with parents when they give an employee a bad review or a small raise. My kids are in elementary school and it is rampant there. My kids have to learn to fend for themselves (unless, of course, if it involved something really serious). If they get a bad grade, they will learn that they need to study harder. If they get the teacher they didn’t want for a certain class, they will learn to deal with people they may not particularly like. If they don’t get the lead role in the play, they will learn that they can still make the best of a situation even if it isn’t exactly what they wanted. I shudder to think how the kids, who have their parents fighting all of their battles for them, will fare in life when they are no longer around.

Yankee, Transferred said...

Cannot imagine it. My kids wouldn't consider bringing me as reinforcement at college. And I really wouldn't consider going.